Living Wills

[mamculuna]

My sister doesn't usually send me stuff that's circling the emails, and I don't usually forward it, but this one is so true:

The Best Living Will I've Seen

I,________ , being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive
indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be
put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade
biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in
simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I
fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Glass of wine
Chocolate
Margarita
Chocolate
Martini
Cold Beer
Chocolate
Chicken fried steak
Cream gravy
Chocolate
Mexican food
Chocolate
French fries
Chocolate
Pizza
Chocolate
Ice cream
Cup of tea
Chocolate
Chocolate
Sex
Chocolate

It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a
determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and
attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

Comments

[midnightsjane.livejournal.com]

Heeee! perfect.

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

Yeah, maybe hospitals can start handing out this form!

[ngakmafaery.livejournal.com]

ahahaha! very cute, and very true...

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

Yeah, very true. My father didn't have a living will when he died 25 years ago, but we knew the end was near when he quit wanting his nightly bourbon and branch water. He would have been the first to sign this!

[ngakmafaery.livejournal.com]

...I work for an elderly lawyer in Vermont, where they have just come up with a very complicated-ish version of it: many many choices, which may or may not be helpful, but they're just sort of trying it out to cover all bases...it's probably online under something about...oh, I forget the outfit: 'compassion and choices'...? Dunno...

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

My husband and I have done the one that some lawyers we know and also a hospital like for the laws in our state. It seems fairly straightforward, but has several parts and has to be notarized.

[ngakmafaery.livejournal.com]

...I think it can be very important, especially for those with actual strong feelings and intentions towards the activity of death, like tibetan buddhists and others who want peace and quiet when it's their time, and also those who really want every drug and machine and tube going...

[angeyja.livejournal.com]

Now I am hungry for fries and gravy. Yum.

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

Oddly, I'm hungry for chocolate...

[ponygirl2000.livejournal.com]

Legally bind me to that!

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

Yeah, no problems for me with signing it!

[angels-nibblet.livejournal.com]

What is this chicken fried steak thing you speak of? Surely Our Dear Lord never intended these two completely unrelated meats to exist on the same plate.

[mamculuna.livejournal.com]

There's a lot of stuff on South Carolina plates that our Dear Lord never intended. However, that dish is only one meat: steak cooked like fried chicken: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicken_fried_steak I know that must be sacrilege to a person from a beef-raising part of the world, but here lard is one of the four basic food groups (others being sugar, bacon--in the form known as "fatback"--and white rice).